Season Six Epi Five Fuck the Pain Away

That was a truly awful title for this episode, and HBO are a bunch of hypocrites because they would allow the epi to be called Fuck the pain away but not spell it out...Weird thought processes....But kudos to the new writer....

Synopsis
Written by Angela Robinson
Directed by Michael Ruscio

Mid-hookup, Sookie threatens Warlow with her "vampire killin' ball of light." Warlow confesses that he loves her and reveals the real reason he killed her parents - they were trying to kill her.

Jessica, high on faerie blood after eating Andy's daughters, can't decide if she's a monster or if she's horny - and even makes a pass at Bill who pushes her away. He's struck by a vision of Lilith turning Warlow vampire, and orders Jessica to her room while he goes in search of "his" progeny.

Meanwhile, Sookie uses her light on Warlow, but the minor burn she inflicts heals instantly. Sookie tells off Warlow - "Get it through your head - I'm not yours or anybody's" when Bill walks in. But he's not there to save Sookie - as his maker, he commands Warlow to come with him.

Tara finds Eric to tell him the LAVTF captured Pam. To save her, Eric and Tara break curfew and allow themselves to be captured by the vamp cops.

Sarah Newlin and Governor Burrell argue about their relationship as he prepares to escort his daughter, Willa, to the vampire internment camp. Sarah wants him to forget Willa; she'll have his baby if he'll marry her first, but Burrell won't hear of it.

Bill brings Warlow to Takahashi's makeshift lab and stabs in him the neck with a syringe, stealing his potentially life-saving faerie-vampire blood. As Bill taps his precious resource, Warlow flashes back to Lilith turning him in 3500 B.C. "You made me into something I despise."

Jason arrives home and finds Sarah Newlin waiting for him, on the premise of "saving his soul." Though confident in the state of his soul, Jason, hoping to banish his homoerotic dreams of Ben, likes the sound of Sarah's reasoning: "I truly believe God wants me to f*** you."

Andy discovers the remains of his faerie daughters in the foyer of the Compton place as Jessica, wracked with guilt, hides from him. Among the carnage, one girl clings to life and Andy rushes her back to the station to get some life-saving "V" in her. Later, he tells Holly what his one surviving daughter revealed: it was Jessica - not Bill - who killed her sisters.

Not knowing where else to go, a distraught Jessica shows up at Jason's, begging to know if and why Jason loved her. Unfortunately, their heart-to-heart is interrupted by a seething Sarah Newlin. She calls Jessica a "demon whore" and rescinds her invitation to Jason's house. Jessica is whisked out the door and into the arms of the waiting LAVTF. Sarah storms out, livid with Jason for defiling her body with his "vampire-loving pecker."

Once at camp, Eric finds himself the subject of bizarre experiments - but not Pam. Pam, meanwhile, is forced to talk to a "psychiatrist" who threatens her into cooperation with guns and a reward of a female "donor" to feed on for every insight she can provide about vampires. When asked about the value she places on vampire life, Pam explains she never feels remorse for killing another vampire and claims she'd feel nothing if her maker were killed.

Sookie asks Lafayette to use his powers as a medium to contact her parents - she needs to know if Warlow is telling her the truth about their intentions that fateful night.

At Merlotte's, Terry meets with Justin, a former Marine. He asks Justin to kill him, goading him into it by revealing he killed Patrick just days earlier. Justin agrees to do it - free of charge.

Sookie and Lafayette sit down to channel her parents and before long, Lafayette has a vision of the Stackhouse kitchen the night Sookie's parents died. Warlow came to explain their daughter was his destiny - that he was a prince and she'd be his princess - and once Sookie came of age he would return to make her vampire. Corbett and Michelle planned to kill Sookie to keep her "safe."

Seeing an opportunity to finish what he started, Corbett's spirit invades Lafayette. Lafayette-Corbett binds up Sookie, throws her in the back of his car, and drives to a nearby lake to drown her.

Back in the lab, Warlow tells Billith that he hates what she turned him into, and blames her for his massacre of his village and family. Warlow tells him that he never believed Lilith's prophecy, dismissing them as "rantings of a lunatic." He killed his maker once and he plans to do it again.

At camp, a calmer Sarah presents Governor Burrell with a surprise - Eric Northman in captivity. With help from Steve Newlin, they've learned Eric's connection to Pam, and the two of them are placed in a chamber, each armed with a stake. They're expected to fight - to the death.

First of all I would like to say how much I enjoy the fact the story lines are tighter and tighter and they focus more on the vampire story than the other less important peripheral story lines. So to tackle the epi...

First off, there are so many potential deaths coming our way, it is hard to say who is gonna buy the farm...But my money is on Terry. He is a regular cast member but not exactly one we would be heartbroken to lose...

And I am suspecting that Jason is actually the one who gets Jessica and Pam and Eric and Nora and them out of the prison....

Sookie, man, for the first time since you thought Bill was burned up in the Monroe Nest, I felt sorry for you. Finding out your momma and daddy were gonna drown you after sedating you with niquil, that has got to be rough...but Lafayette needs to learn how to keep the spirits from possessing him....

And another member of the pity party was for Andy Bellefleur...Poor guy...and now he knows Bill did not hurt them and it was Jessica who ate her sisters to death....

So I am ready for some shit to go down on this camp...I thought there for a moment either Eric or Tara and Jessica was going to have to prove themselves on the yard and fight to keep from being somebody's bitch...I swear visions of OZ were dancing through my head...

And Bill, man, you got to get a hold on that Warlow and get him restrained before Jason is the one who saves all Vampire kind

Here’s how I saw the latest offering….

Warlow - Poor baby, you definitely have the longest case of blue danglys ever. Seriously dude, you’re so deep in shit now that the object of your affection has managed to bring you to the attention of your maker incarnate. Frankly, I firmly believe that you were totally justified in charring her unevolved bitch ass. A simple warning with explanation would have saved your son millennia of heartache. On a shallow note, thank God you got a new ‘do’, because your 3 500BC hair sucked. Kick ass dimples though.

Bill - You may very well be on the right track with Warlow but honey, you have to realize that Lillith has pretty much absorbed the essence that is you and that quite frankly is not a good thing.

Jess - Between draining those faerie girls, dry humping Bill’s leg and now a major crisis of faith that’s gotten you carted off to vamp camp you’re gonna have to calm down. You should have drained the Newlin twit, but that’s my opinion.

Gov. Burrell - Truman, you had better watch out for your pecker because that blond bigot is on a mission and your sperm are the prize. If you’re not careful, you’ll wind up paying for at least 18 years. Oh yeah, and you suck as a daddy just ask poor Willa.

Sarah - For the love of God do NOT reproduce! I only hope Jason’s little swimmers don't hook up with one of your eggs because that would be one messed up offspring. I wonder if ‘God wants me to fuck you’ works on other men? I gotta give it to you, it’s a pretty good line.

Jason - You’ve defiled the temple of Newlin with your vampire loving pecker, Imagine that. I wonder what would have happened if you’d hooked up with Steve, something to ponder. I truly hope you joining the LAVTF isn’t going to be a repeat of your sojourn with the FoTS.

Andy - Holly is a better woman that you deserve and lord knows she’s sure as shite smarter than you. She’s right though, those girls have gone back to their momma, Mirella’s vamp scraps too.

Terry - Shoot the shit is right.

Justin - I’m taking up a collection, you deserve a reward.

Alcide - Only weres would hang out at a club called The Unfriendly Possum. Now if only you could keep from pissing off everyone you come across, not to mention the redneck whose gaydar you triggered. Really, you need to get your head out of your ass or better yet, Riki’s ass.

Jackson - I don’t blame you for ditching your son’s pack.

Jenny - I have to agree with you, shiftn’ during sex isn’t the thing no matter how much they pay you. Hope you had fun with daddy Herveaux because he needed a bit of fun himself.

Pam - your cynicism is epic and strangely insightful but you seem to have overplayed the ‘I don’t need no stinkin’ maker’ card.

Eric - I understand your motivation in signing up for vamp camp but baby cakes I fear this is not going to end well at all.

Willa - Don’t go anywhere near that butt munch’s balls sweetie because you just know he’s gonna be nasty and funky.

Sam - Go back to Merlotts and tend bar because your shifter shenanigans are getting on my very last nerve.

Tara - That’s our scrappy lil baby vamp, watch over our stoned redhead but watch your back because I’m not sure owing that level 1 she vamp is a positive thing.

Lafayette - We seriously need to get you someone to teach you how to channel the spirits. Because possession may be nine tenths of the law, but it sucks in a major way when it’s your ass being possessed.

Momma and Daddy Stackhouse - Michelle and Corbett, you all deserved eatin’ if anyone does. Killing your baby girl because you don’t like the thought of what could be her future goes against God and nature. While I’m at it, Corbett get your ignorant ass out of Lafayette!

Sookie - Sugar Boo Boo somehow suits you. You need to do some major thinking because, to quote Jack Nicolson in A Few Good Men “You can’t handle the truth.” Oh, and don’t forget to hold your breath baby.

Finally, when a woman comes to you in black lingerie you have to unwrap her, I gotta try that sometime.

Renee